Sometimes there are times in our lives where we know we need to do something different; we need to shake things up a bit, but we don’t know where or how to start.

I talk with many clients about all aspects of change and how we can put together a plan to facilitate it in the most productive (and least scary) way.

Areas of change.

These obviously vary from person to person, but the most common areas around change that come up with my clients are:

• Appearance – Feeling like you need a change? Maybe something has happened to you recently and you want a different look or perhaps you’ve outgrown your current style and want a makeover?
• Job – You might not have been happy for a while and feel like life is too short to remain somewhere where you’re no longer happy? Maybe it’s larger than that and you’re desperate to do something completely different?
• Location – The children have flown the nest; you might have split up from a partner and want a change of house/home? Or perhaps you just fancy living somewhere else?
• Relationship – You’re no longer in one or you’re looking for a new relationship and feel the time is now. Maybe you want to get out of the relationship you’re in and you’re ready for change?

All of these things can be major life changing events and – on the face of it – feel very scary but with the right help and support, change can be SO exciting.

 Ask yourself these questions –

1. If I were to make this change, how could my life look?

• If I make no changes, how will my life look?

• What is the scariest factor in making this change?

• By making this change, how will I benefit and what will be the positive impact on those around me?

• What would be the most exciting part of making this change?

Change can be unpopular.

Change isn’t always embraced by those in our circles since it can alter the dynamics of our interactions. Nevertheless, that shouldn’t deter us. If you’re contemplating a significant shift in your life, there’s a valid reason behind it. It suggests an imbalance in your current situation, and you have every right to take steps to rectify that.

Find an objective sounding board.

This is where I step in. Life coaching provides you with an objective ally, someone who will cheer you on and offer support as you navigate potentially challenging decisions without passing judgment.

Go for it!

Why wouldn’t you? If you’re creating change for a positive impact on your life, you’re not purposefully out to hurt others – why would you not try something different? Maybe this change will be the making of you but you won’t know until you try!

The post The fear of change. appeared first on KATE TILSTON - PRACTICAL LIFE COACH.

You might be reading this, and although you are much younger, feel that you too need to shake things up, to make changes in your life. Great…read on.

When clients discuss significant changes with me, authenticity often emerges as a key concern. They express a desire to stay true to themselves while navigating transformations. It’s understandable—we recognise areas in our lives that require change, but we still wish to remain true to ourselves.

Now, I’m not talking about “you can be whoever/whatever you want to be” – the mantra of many life coaches. I’m talking about when you reach certain stages in your life and think “Actually, this no longer serves me, I’d like to try something different.”

Looking and feeling different.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve experimented with many fashion styles throughout my life. I’ve sported the Princess Di haircut. I’ve shaved my hair off in the style of Sinead O’Connor. I even went down the fishnet tights and Dr Marten boots road (I hasten to add, I did wear other clothes as well) – all of which have suited that particular time in my life.

When did we stop being brave about fashion?

You might not have noticed it yourself, but from discussions with clients and friends, it appears that as we reach our 40s and 50s, we become somewhat less eager to explore new experiences. Is it perhaps due to a fear of seeming foolish, or maybe we’re concerned about not embarrassing our children? Is it because our lifestyles have changed and therefore our clothing has changed to match it – it doesn’t need to be a negative reason either.

Re-invention or reinstating your vibe?

I LOVE fashion. I know that over the last few years, I have settled for less fashionable clothing, probably because the seaside town where I live is somewhat conservative in its clothing approach and I don’t think I wanted to stand out.

How did that happen? I’ve never worried about standing out so I decided to jumpstart my style, to reinstate my vibe, to stop apologising for not fitting in and to wear more of what I love.

The jumpstart.

I know it’s not just me that feel this way, I talk to people about it all the time so here are some simple actions to start the process.

1. Have a wardrobe de-clutter – It sounds obvious but really look at what you have in your wardrobe. Do your clothes bring you joy? Are you hanging onto things from a previous life that now need to go. Make space for new or updated.
2. Create vision boards/Pinterest boards – Browse other people’s styles and identify elements you admire. Consider how you can incorporate those ideas into your own visual identity. What ideas could you use for you? Have fun creating a new image or updating your existing one.
3. Look back at old photos – Are there pictures of you where you LOVED your style? What did you love about it and why? Can you use any of those old style ideas now?
4. People watch – Get out! Go to places where you know there will be lots of different styles. What do you love and why? Feel the energy of people loving what they’re wearing.
5. Be brave – Try a new item, whether it’s a pair of shoes, a different coat, a funky handbag. Start with something that brings you joy but isn’t too scary and work on your overall look. It’s a fabulous feeling.

The red shoes.

Red is my colour – I love it. I’m known for wearing it, but it too has made a quiet, but noticeable, retreat from my wardrobe. So, when in London recently, strolling around Soho and people watching (one of my favourite things to do) I spotted bright red patent Mary Jane shoes. They were absolutely GORGEOUS.

My younger self would have just tried them on, loved them and bought them. 55-year-old Kate asked herself if she really needed them, if she could afford them, if she would have enough occasions to wear them?

ENOUGH……  “F**k it” I thought! Life is too short NOT to have delicious red patent shoes and so I bought them. I might not wear them very often, but they bring me joy and more importantly, they are a timely reminder as to who I am and I needed to be reminded of that.

The post The joy of re-invention – wear the red shoes appeared first on KATE TILSTON - PRACTICAL LIFE COACH.