I don’t know about you, but I seem to be going along quite calmly, adapting to “the new normal”, feeling like perhaps I can manage this new lifestyle when all of a sudden…………..
CRASH!!! BANG!!!! WALLOP!!!
I come to a grinding halt, look around me and have something similar to a toddler’s temper tantrum where I want to stamp my feet, lie rigid on the ground kicking and screaming shouting “it’s not fair, I don’t like it, I don’t want to do it like this!”
You’ll be relieved to hear that I haven’t resorted to that (yet) but it’s come close. I have waves over overwhelming sadness at the loss of life, of the millions of people in far less fortunate situations than myself who due to where they live will have even greater suffering thanks to Covid 19 and that’s on top of their usual struggles with life. Obviously my job means that I work with people who are losing their jobs, who are struggling with coping both physically and mentally and I can’t even give them a hug. Totally overwhelming sometimes.
And then I stop.
And I pause
And I take a very deep breath.
I remind myself that I’m not a 2 year old who’s been told they can’t have their favourite sweeties, I’m a 51 year old Life Coach who might feel overwhelmed and sad but I can choose as to how I cope with that without resorting to a meltdown.
What do I choose? Well firstly I choose to be very grateful that I am safe, that my family & friends are safe and well and those that are not, I choose compassion rather than hopelessness and know that I can try to make a difference by being there for them in whatever way I can.
I choose joy. I choose to look for the joy in everyday – it can be a beautiful sky appearing just in time for my early morning walk, it can be a client achieving something wonderful, it can be a virtual cuppa and a chat with a close friend. All joyful things.
I choose not to catastrophize about the current world we live in. I don’t listen to as much news as I did, I avoid negative reporting whether it be on news channels or social media. I choose to believe that they will find a vaccine and there will be a solution to this pandemic even if it takes time to do so.
I choose to unfollow or “snooze” negative people on my social media feeds. I don’t need to know about their theories, I don’t need to be wound up by their opinions or feel their anger. I concentrate on those who also choose joy and positive messages.
Once I have stepped back, taken that breath, clicked on the reset button, I’m ready to go again and that for me, is far healthier than any other option. I’m working with several of my clients right now on the choices they need to/want to make and I see what a difference it can make to someone’s mental wellbeing when they feel they are in control of their choices rather than backed into a corner through what they feel is no fault of their own. it’s very powerful.
Saying that, there might be a day I choose to lie rigid on the floor kicking and screaming, hopefully it won’t be somewhere too public and I wont get arrested for causing a disturbance!
How are you choosing to cope with the “new normal?”
What choices are you making that will have a positive impact on your life?
Stay safe and well and please continue to be kind to both yourself and others.